Thursday, November 29, 2007

I Just Couldn't Do It!

Anyone who knows me knows I don't like the cold weather.
Today was day 3 of a cold snap....the basic temperatures aren't TOO bad, based on winter (I think it was about -20C this morning), but the wind bites pretty hard. (It's ranged between -31 and -40C)
I got up this morning to do my papers (121 today), not feeling my best. Got dressed and dragged my butt out there, in a parka, wool socks, boots, gloves, ski mask type hat. Drove to the pick up location. No papers. So I climbed back into the car to wait, still not feeling great. I sat there for about half an hour, maybe a bit more, before the truck came and dumped off the bundles....11 bundles of 10, 1 bundle of 11. I shakily got out of the van and went to load them up into my vehicle...got about 4 bundles loaded and just stopped and stared at them for a minute. I was so cold and miserable I couldn't even think. Even dressed as I was, even having sat in the car, my toes and fingers were in deep pain from being frozen.
I just couldn't do it. I just couldn't. So I unloaded the 4 bundles again, called the office and left a message that I was sick. Came home and sent an e-mail to my boss-of-the-week, letting him know I had called in sick, and asking for a smaller route instead, for future days, as cold, timing, snow, and health have been causing problems for me, mostly in terms of finishing on time.
I sat at the computer for an HOUR....and was still frozen. So I filled the tub with water as hot as I could stand (which is pretty hot, I might add) and hopped in. I soaked for at least half an hour....and when I got out, I was STILL frozen in the middle!
It is now 4 hours since I got home, 2 1/2 hours since the bath. I am still a bit chilly, exhausted beyond description, stiff jointed, my muscles are fatigued and sore....and I didn't even DO anything!
I was talking with Husband about how my job (which I have been doing on and off for at least 5 years, minus maternity leave and several weeks of time off due to injury of a wrist and stitches in an ankle)just doesn't seem to be working for me anymore. I used to enjoy it, now I dread it every day. He gave me an option....with a big contract he got recently, if I forego getting my clunker of a car in the spring, then as soon as he gets paid for this contract, I can quit. I am thinking this will be a good idea....I will get full nights of sleep instead of a short sleep plus a nap, and I will have that extra time to work on keeping the house the way it should be and to spend more time with the kids and Husband....and I think it will definitely reduce my fatigue level, boost my health, likely help my mood and my interactions with others....all in all, I'm thinking it would be worth it to stay a one-car-family for awhile longer, in trade for my sanity and health, and focus on being a stay-at-home mom full-time for awhile.
I hope he gets paid quickly.

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