Deep Thoughts

Yesterday I bemoaned the fact that my blog is not deep and serious sounding. Today I have deep and serious thoughts. I would rather I didn't.
Last night, I had a fun evening...got together with a few other Prairie Gold members, and talked about membership....how to get people, how to keep the ones we have...a lot of laughing and talking and sharing....and some goodies, too. No singing because we didn't have any baris there last night. They want me to join the board in some form, but I really don't know what I'd be any good at...certainly nothing involving phoning people I don't know or dealing with people I don't know. Our chorus director gave me a gigantic compliment, in my mind, last night. We were talking about me and the board, and I had said I just didn't think I was the right kind of person, too shy and definitely not the leader type....she said I AM a leader already....that I'd make a great leader because I lead by example (I'm there on time, I'm where I'm supposed to be, doing what I'm supposed to do, I've taped and passed all my songs..), and some people in leadership roles are terrible examples.
Then came the serious stuff. I came home and before I headed off to bed, I checked my e-mail. My Mom had gone in for some tests awhile back, on something the doctors found during a different procedure...basically the tests are back, and they found pre-cancerous cells. Mom tells me the procedure is relatively fast and easy, but it doesn't really put my mind at ease. I don't think it really will be at ease until she is deemed cancer free and stays that way for quite awhile. It's quite a blow to hear this latest news....a few years ago, my Dad was found to have bladder cancer. He is cancer free now, as far as we know, but I remember it was a tense time for all. It just doesn't seem fair. They take care of themselves, they don't smoke, they're still young and active...and they both get cancer. I know how it feels to be told that your parent has cancer, but I can't imagine how it must feel to be the one the doctor says "You have cancer" to.
To be totally selfish, I have to admit this really scares me. Most, if not all, of my grandparents died of cancer. Husband's grandparents on his Mom's side had Alzheimers. What kind of future do we have waiting for us? I used to think the cancer was because they smoked or lived with someone who did...and now I have relatives who don't smoke, but still got cancer. Am *I* going to get cancer one day? Is Husband going to get Alzheimers? What about our children? Are my parents going to have to go through cancer again, or will they stay healthy after this?